Scuba Diver Is Hospitalized After He Tried Having Sex With A Giant Clam

A scuba diver is being hospitalized at Ka’u hospital on the island of Hawaii after he inserted his penis into a giant clam while recreational diving. Sean, 22, was transported to Ka’u hospital after suffering from severe breathing complications, vomiting, extreme swelling and low blood pressure. Doctors believe physical contact with the giant mollusk may have triggered his allergy to seafood and exposed him to high levels of arsenic.

The scuba diver, whose condition has stabilized, said he inserted his penis inside the clam as a prank to impress his friend, Thomas Meyer. “It was just a joke at first. My friend was filming so I wanted to impress him and put my dick into the clam, but then it just wouldn’t let go” he told reporters. The amateur diver also admitted he was still hung over from the night before and had consumed GHB and ecstasy, which impaired his judgment at the time. “It didn’t hurt or anything, it felt warm and cozy inside the clam, but I was afraid my oxygen reserves were getting low,” he admitted.

After eventually releasing himself from the clam, the young man later developed a severe allergic reaction and was rushed to Ka’u Hospital. A doctor at Ka’u Hospital believes that diver’s body reacted to the digestive enzymes of the giant mollusk, which was possibly trying to digest the man’s genitals at the time of the incident; He admits it is the first case of its kind he has seen in his 22 years of practice. “Allergies to seafood are fairly common and usually occur after ingestion of fish or shellfish, not after sexual intercourse with shellfish,” he told local reporters.

A fatal incident occurred at the Waikiki Aquarium in Honolulu when an aquarium employee put his head inside a giant clam and lost consciousness before he could be rescued, confirming the local reputation of the mollusk as a ‘killer clam’. In Hawaii folklore, the clam goddess Wawa U’ru was forcefully impregnated by A’ua A’uku, the shark god, but snapped the shark God’s genitals as revenge, leaving him emasculated and thus giving birth to the natives of Hawaii.